Monday, January 29, 2007

Those that can... buy.

There are two routes to becoming a Headteacher.

1) Train as a teacher and enthusiastically adopt every policy dreamt up by those above you; no matter how insane. Fill out every form that comes your way and nod your head frequently during Staff Meetings. Work your way up to Head of Department, keep crawling and agreeing with the SMT, go on endless useless courses and above all, do not stick your neck out supporting anyone with silly old fashioned ideas such as making pupils behave themselves.

Now apply for Deputy Head and be extra vigilant in not supporting anyone below you no matter what. Pepper your speech with the buzzwords of the day and dream up as many ludicrous ideas as you can. Do not rock the boat, upset any parents or accidently expel anyone. Just keep agreeing with the Head and finally apply for position of Headteacher. Bingo!

2) Buy the school

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

link doesn't work. Take // off the end to make it work.

alanorei said...

Actually, Frank, you've just vindicated Gilbert and Sullivan.

"I polished up the handle on the big front door etc."

Anonymous said...

This is quality advise for any brownnosing,politically correct,braindead jobsworth in any field of public or corporate enterprise in this country.Well done!Keep up the good work.

youdontknowme said...

I would have headteachers elected by the parents.

dearieme said...

As usual, money is jusat so CLEAN compared to the alternative.

Anonymous said...

I swear you were listening to my last staffroom rant.

Cynical

Anonymous said...

Have you noticed how many in route one ain't very good at teaching? Then they become inspectors and want you to listen while they rip your lesson apart. I told one to fuck off last year - ok I was in angry mode - it felt good, very good.

Anonymous said...

Bully for her. I suppose the less financially blessed parents of all the other autistic and dyslexic kids will just have to struggle on in the state system - you know, the one not good enough for the kids of the people who run it.

Anonymous said...

I've dealt with special needs provision more fully in more detail on my own blog, but all I can say is that young Jacob would be much better prepared for adult life if he went to a mainstream school full of normal people, if only so he has time to get used to being called 'freak' and 'retard' every damn day. He's in for a horrible shock when he gets to university or starts his first job...

Quick Home Sale UK said...

At first i was thinkin that this was a funny post but realizing it this is serious hope not a lot will be this power hungry.

Quick Home Sale UK said...

I just cant get over this site! How come its not updated anymore?