STOP PRESS:
I apologise for the interruption to your evening, but Fran from Oop North Somewhere has just informed me that from September, the Form Tutors at their school will be renamed 'Achievement Tutors'.
This leads us neatly round to Chalk's 9th Law of Teaching:
The grander the title given, the less able the person who gave it.
Your own examples are of course welcome.
16 comments:
Hey, this is a good game! Can I be called a 'Literature Delivery Operative' or a 'Classic Text Educative Processes Manager'?
The rot set in when we started calling the kids "students" rather than "pupils".
I reckon we still need a PISOP* for both "students" and the people who come up with these stupid job titles.
PISOP = Physical Impact (Seat Of Pants) Manager.
In teacher training, the pupils are called "learners". Even if they don't ever learn a thing. I'm waiting for the cleaners to be called "floor hygienists", and the caretakers "excellence in maintennance managers".
Perhaps teachers could be renamed Holistic Client-Centered Knowledge Acquisition Facilitators.
WONDERFUL idea. but a wee bit discriminating...how would a dyslexia-enhanced holistic learner ever read that...
The phrase "Collaborative learning centres" makes me want to vomit.
Clearly, we've taken a leaf out of the `Iranian School of Election Candidate Vote Categorisation Re-adjustment and Non-Losing`, where there is no overall winner, just tens of millions of people who also won, but to a lower category of winning.
Yes. As in "all animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than the others".....
Because I teach chemistry, would I be known as a 'Test Tube Babe'!
Look, I've been a "Classroom-based Skills and Knowledge Acquisition Facilitator" for several years now, and I'm bloody proud of it!
At least it stops the buggers here shouting out 'teacher' when they want my attention...
Achievement Tutor ind. I think we all know who will be held responsible for the kids' achievement completely regardless of their contribution to it.
At my school, the heads of year are called "Directors of Learning"
Chief Constable
Love it, Gadget
How about
"Prime Minister"
"Chancellor of the Exchequer"
"Foreign Secretary"
and last, but not least
"Home Secretary"
Title is the term which describe the whole object.
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