Sunday, June 25, 2006

An Unfortunate Tale

An interesting article appearing in several newspapers over the weekend concerning 10 year old James Smith; the child whose tragic collection of medical conditions is baffling experts up and down the country. Let’s hear from Dr. Jones, Chief Physician at the hospital where James is receiving treatment:

“James has been diagnosed with an extremely rare affliction known as Nondyslexia which prevents him from receiving an extra hour or so in his exams. The mystery disease allows him to read and write words and even whole sentences whilst at the same time spelling them correctly. Although common in the past, this condition, like Polio and TB. is virtually unknown in Britain today. We genuinely thought that it had been stamped out over the last thirty years” said Dr. Jones, clearly shaken.

A handful of cases of Nondyslexia have turned up before but experts say that this is the first time that it has been combined with Nonadhd and Nonaspbergers. Tests are currently being done for Asthma and Tourettes Syndrome. A spokesman from the hospital said:

“It is very, very sad but we are all keeping our fingers crossed that the remaining tests prove positive and that he will be allowed to receive the extra help and resources that his peers get. Thankfully, modern medical technology allows us to discover problems that would not have been noticed in the past.”

Remarkably, doctors remain optimistic for the young lad’s future.

“It is believed that once James starts at an inner city comprehensive school, his spelling, grammar and concentration levels should gradually deteriorate and become more like his peers. He should be able to live a normal life.”

5 comments:

Ted from Technology said...

Love it! YOu're a bad man Mr. Chalk.

PhysicsPhil said...

Excellent! Great to read some quality humour. Keep them coming.

St. Mary's Geography said...

It's great to have you back. Morning break hasn't been the same since you stopped posting. Saty with us!

Bag said...

The sad part is I can believe it is true. Fingers crossed for him to fall to an under age hussy and ruin his life that way instead. They like to latch on to those that look like they have a future.

Anonymous said...

BULLSHIT!